I’ve been trying to expand my mind and my outlook on life so, I’ve been more open with people and let them in on how I and other people live that may not be used to, or normal to them. Naturally people have totally different experiences growing up so some things people are not exposed to. Now I do not take things as literal as everyone else… A name for something doesn’t mean that that’s what it even really is or that that thing is only that word.
For example, people always ask me about “pimping”. Ok I heard of and knew about and of pimps since I was a kid.. So there’s a stigma people have of this word…. They think there’s some guy beating the crap out of some woman forcing her to stroll the streets giving 20$ blowjobs for crack or some guy with gold chains walking girls on leashes and forcing them into the sex trade. While both MAY be something that happens… There’s many more situations that happen and a much broader meaning behind all of this that people have a hard time grasping.
First to understand why a woman would meet a man and decide to let him control her and the money she makes, you’ve got to look at modern marriage. So two people get married and put everything they have together.. Got it. They consider each other always in their decisions… sexually, financial, emotionally.. and figure out who is in charge of what. Now what did same sex couples do before they were legally “allowed” to get married? The ones who believe in marriage still would put their stuff together like a married couple would. They may make financial decisions together or one may be the dominant financial person… Whatever they feel like. That’s their own decision. Same exact thing.
So there’s also people in the world who may not believe in the traditional system of one person forever or marriage with only one person, or doesn’t believe in marriage at all! So with that being said… What do all the people in poly relationships do? Like one man with multiple women, or one woman with multiple men or pansexuals in poly relationships or the gays with a triad or the bisexuals? These people have lives too and need to build their futures and build relationships with multiple people. So how do these people in these relationships work? Well the same way anyone else in relationships work. They communicate and discuss and decide their plan for their lives together.
So my point is basically… People want different things, what someone may have never imagined in their wildest dreams, could be something someone is currently doing.
With that being said, This post is more to address something that I live in everyday. I am a stripper, exotic dancer, whatever you want to call it, and I live in Miami. People down here are open sexually, it’s just what it is. Most people are not afraid to live freely & go for what they want. Personally, I have a man, we’ve been together for awhile & I will always be with him. That’s what I chose, we know what we have and we have a honest relationship which is most important to me. I don’t want to be with other men, I don’t plan on being with any other man at all again period… He’s mine & always will be. BUT, I am bisexual…. I like women & my man also likes other women… So if we both like it and both want it, we are going to live it. What’s wrong with that? It could be sexual or emotional… it’s something we share and discuss… so who says that is wrong? Well we say it’s right… it’s our life and our wants.
ANYWAYS…. Lots of people have been asking me about other girls & their pimps. OK, being that I’ve been working in strip clubs for 9 years in South Florida mostly plus Vegas & some smaller places… I’ve seen A LOT of pimpin. Seriously, I’ve seen all kinds of this pimpin happening… I’m sure not all of it & people all do things differently but the idea is generally the same. (People working together for a common goal).
So we all know it is a struggle to survive out here. We are all a little lost and confused and we all struggle with money and direction. Women that work in clubs like I do are usually pushed into this world for financial reasons and then struggle with what to actually do financially. A woman can go from never even having more than a few hundred dollars in their life to making thousands a day. That’s dramatic. So what do most of us do? We see stars and we start spending, we feel like we joined the ranks of people who have been financially planning their lives for years. We spend like these people, not realizing that these people actually have it mapped out, and we are just blowing through money like we didn’t have to work hard physically and mentally to make it. So what’s wrong with people helping these women manage their finances and start mapping out a plan for their future that will insure them stability and growth? Well, there is NOTHING wrong with that!
So what tends to happen is these women start to look around at their peers who seem to be stable and happy. They wonder what they are doing that is making them elevate higher than others. Usually it is because that women who is stable, is working with others for a common goal. The common goal though, is defined by the people who start with the plan and build the foundation. Every body’s plan is not the same, everybody is interested in different things. Some people like real estate, some like music, some like stocks, or building businesses. Whatever it may be, these people planned it out. So naturally other people will be interested.
So we all agree now that people form groups… kind of like corporations. So let’s take a look at one of these types of groups… The most common type of pimp that is stigmatized is the one who actually does abuse women, yes it exists, yes it is real. So usually this is your common drug addict. The mans an addict and so is the woman or women… Basically they are doing what they can to make money for their addictions, it may be coke, crack, heroin, molly, lean whatever. These people are obviously more simple and focused on their addiction so they do simple things…. like have sex for money, because it’s easy.. it’s in demand… and it’s something they are going to do anyways. Sometimes (a lot) this causes physical abuse and jail time.. maybe even death. I’ve seen it, it does exist. Yes it is fucked up! But what can you do with all these drugs so easily available? It’s bound to happen. Plus, who knows if this man is not being abused himself?
So then there’s ALSO people who know that sex sells and aren’t actually on drugs and do enjoy exchanging sex for money. They also want to be stable so usually there’s a man (or woman) who may orchestrate the whole thing. Find their clients for them or show them where to go and how to go about finding their own clients, but it’s a business. So this man (or woman) controls all the business and there could be multiple women (or men) who work for them. And they could also all be emotionally or sexually involved with each other or some and have a family… or not! They could be only involved through their business. This shit is real.
The same thing that happens with the sex trade also happens with strippers. Some strippers actually do sell sex which is all their decision and the people they are involved with decision. But anyways, there are strippers who do not sell sex at all, they sell the fantasy… blah blah… if you’re reading this you most likely know about the strip club world somewhat and know what we do. So it’s only natural that people team up in the club too! Now I will not say that there’s not abuse going on with these people. I see strippers getting abused just like a drug addict could… and there are plenty of drug addicts in the club.
Well let’s look at these groups of people objectively. When I say team up I mean these people get money together, point blank period. The common goal is financial success. Who ever the leader is (CEO… “pimp”… “daddy”… “folks”) pretty much decides how this is going to work… the days and hours the “employees” work, the petty cash they keep (salary), how much the leader takes for the company and what the “company” is actually investing in.
So people do this pimpin everyday. Every corporation in America is pimpin somebody in the literal sense of the word. People are more comfortable to be pimped when it’s involving something as simple as going to an office for X amount of hours a day or working construction, rather than when they are doing something like selling their bodies. Which in reality is the same exact thing. People just enjoy doing different things with their lives. Some people like to teach some like to fuck some like to engineer. Whatever, if you look at it objectively… It’s all the same thing.
Going back to all these people who have been asking me about these pimps… You also have to factor in that all these people who are WORKING, still are people with wants needs and desires. People love and live and don’t only work. Also, people one day want to retire and not feel like they are working at all! So basically this word pimp is made up of many descriptions.
Sometimes it can be a game of lies, manipulation, and abuse in some cases but, I can guarantee you that there is plenty honesty, success, and happiness that can evolve in more cases.
The women who I interact with all the time have different situations… I know women who are straight, who are with one man who has multiple women with, who do not interact with his other women and he may sleep with and be involved with them for life. So that’s like one man… many woman who are committed to him. Some women and men are HAPPY with that, it suits them and they love it… contrary to beliefs… this may be what some people are actually looking for. Also, there are multiple women who like a specific man and like women who are involved with that one man and other women that they enjoy together. Like sexually, emotionally, financially, etc with the plan on being together for life or a long time. So they all like each other and all work together with and for each other…. doesn’t sound so fucked up when you think about it another way, does it? There are so many combinations that can occur like this… but what people fail to realize is that people are into different things and want what they want, and will go hard at getting it and wont stop until they have what they want and what makes them happy. A family unit does not have to consist of only two partners.
Putting a bad stigma on something because of a word or a rumor or what general society deems as “weird” or “wrong” or “bad” is, first off, NOT going to stop it from happening, and may also make someone miss out on something they may benefit from just because of small minded people who can’t comprehend things besides what they have been exposed to through out their life. Yes, there are people in bad situations who need help, and yes sometimes this type of lifestyle can be a savior or a down fall… it all depends on who you choose to share your life with… always make sure you believe in what you’re doing and your mind is not being manipulated. Some people stand very strongly for what they are doing even when it is clear to others that there is something wrong going on. Abuse is when someone does something to you that you don’t want and makes you insecure, afraid, or at risk…and only your own self can determine that. To determine that, always look within yourself first and see if you feel comfortable where you are at, and the people you are with help you grow and fulfill your personal dreams, not just the dreams of others. Also that your healthy and fulfilled when you’re at home.
Thanks for reading… There’s a lot more in my brain that I’m trying to find perspective on and help other people wrap their minds around & anyone who takes the time out to read what I have to say… I appreciate you more than you can know & I hope you learned something & may become a little more open minded and peaceful!!!